Chapter 4

After dinner Nova excused himself for a moment, retreating into a room and closing the door. Zanni and I shared a look.

“How’s it going with Nova at the library?” Zanni asked. I shook my head.

“We’re getting nowhere fast,” I said. “You?”

“Master Shan says I have a lot of potential, but even with this training it may not be enough to stop Obra. He was there when Obra rampaged. He actually tried to fight him. He’s still not sure how he survived it,” Zanni said. He looked serious. Not uncharacteristically so — I knew the cheerful, teasing, happy-go-lucky little brother routine was at least partially an act. I bit my lip.

“That… doesn’t bode well,” I said. Zanni nodded.

“And the reason they sealed him up was because they weren’t aware of anyone powerful enough to actually defeat him conclusively and split them back up,” Zanni continued. I whistled.

“Damn,” I said. 

“What’s got you two looking so blue?” Nova asked a moment later. 

“Oh, you know, just worried about Meliné,” Zanni replied, seamlessly transitioning back into the cheerful, happy-go-lucky persona. Nova frowned.

“I do have some rather dire news about that,” he said. Both of us sat up at attention. He sighed. “Obra has killed around 80% of the population. Survivors are being hunted down as we speak. All of the major cities are completely destroyed. It’s not looking good.” His frown deepened. “I’m concerned that he is going to try to find his way to the sanctuary of your guardian deity to kill her once he gets bored with hunting down all of the mortals.” 

We both sat there, completely stunned.

“Shit. He can do that?” Zanni swore. I didn’t even have it in me to nag him about swearing. 

“If…if he gets her,” I stuttered out, “there’s no saving Meliné, is there? There’s no bringing everyone back, no fixing all the cities, no—”

“There is a way,” Nova, thankfully, cut me off. Zanni and I both looked at him, desperate. “It’s true that your guardian deity can only preside over Meliné and the things that happen there. There is a guardian deity here that presides over other guardians. If we find a way to stop Obra, we can beseech her to restore your guardian deity…assuming Obra doesn’t just destroy Meliné itself, entirely.” 

“But if he does destroy Meliné, it’s just gone?” I asked. He shook his head. 

“The deity here may be able to restore Meliné, but it would take a very long time,” Nova said, sounding doubtful. 

“Obra may also come here and kill all of us and this guardian deity too,” Zanni said, face grim. “And that’s really the end, isn’t it?” Nova just nodded. 

“Why didn’t your guardian deity restore all the gods that Obra killed during his rampage?” I asked. Nova looked like he’d been struck. 

“I have often wondered that myself,” Nova answered, his voice very, very quiet. “But it is not my place to question her.” My mind raced. Why wouldn’t she restore the fallen gods? It didn’t make any sense. Unless…she couldn’t. I opened my mouth to ask, but I just snapped it shut with a shake of my head. I didn’t need to go throwing out baseless accusations, especially about a deity that Nova seemed to have such anxiety about.

Unlike the previous night, Zanni fell asleep almost immediately and proceeded to snore like a godsdamned chainsaw. I tried to sleep and failed, miserably, so instead I struggled in the kitchen for a while making myself a cup of tea (why didn’t Nova have a normal kettle? Why was everything so high tech here?!) and then went to sit outside. Nova’s house had something that resembled a porch, and once I shut the door behind me I couldn’t hear a peep from Zanni. I sighed. Maybe I could just sleep out here? It was a pleasant temperature, and there was a soft, gentle breeze flowing through the area, stirring the grasses. There were areas where the grass was tall and unkempt, but closer to the roads it was trimmed like a lawn, or so it seemed. There weren’t any bird noises. Just the sound of grass. I knew from our flights to and from the library that the grasslands stretched far away in every direction. Maybe this whole planet, or whatever we were on, was just nothing but grasslands and buildings. 

But then, where did the food come from?

I sat out there nursing my cup of tea for a while, just watching the waves of grass. Eventually I heard the door squeak open and Nova, predictably, sat down beside me.

“Can’t sleep?” he asked. I snorted.

“Did you hear Zanni snoring? Of course not,” I replied. Nova chuckled. “He didn't snore like this last night. Or when he was a kid,” I lamented, pouting. 

“I am truly sorry that I don’t have a guest room,” Nova said.

“Well, you weren’t expecting to have to house two mortals, now were you?” I asked. He shook his head. “And…I’m guessing you don’t get a lot of other Observer gods as guests, huh?” He looked sad at that. I was almost sorry that I’d asked, but—

“I haven’t had a guest here in nearly one hundred years,” he admitted. I blinked. I did the math in my head. He hadn’t had a guest since he was, developmentally, around thirteen years old. He continued. “I moved in when I was only one hundred.” I did more math. He would have been, what, the equivalent of seven years old when he moved into the house?!

“I hope you don’t mind me asking this,” I blurted out. “But, your parents…?”

“They are very much still alive, but they are quite busy. They were on the younger side of the gods that survived Obra’s rampage, so they inherited a lot of duties. They’re filling in for the equivalent of about three or four gods each.” 

“They abandoned you—” I started, but Nova shook his head emphatically.

“You misunderstand. I saw the toll it was taking on them, trying to raise me and deal with all of those responsibilities. I asked them to let me live on my own,” he said. 

Just like me.

Well. Not just like me.

“I…I ran away when I was seven,” I said. I swallowed. “I get it. It’s not exactly the same, but I get it.” I sighed. “At least I had Pykon.” I’d been a fiercely independent kid, but Pykon had kept me from literally starving to death, falling to my death, getting eaten by wild animals… “Pykon! Is he…?” I trailed off, not having the guts to outright ask if he was dead yet or not. Nova shook his head.

“I looked. He is still alive on Meliné in some capacity,” he said. 

In some capacity. 

I shuddered.

“I’m sorry,” he said. I shook my head.

“It’s not your fault,” I whispered. He nodded. Gears turned in my head.

“Your guardian deity hasn’t brought any of the dead gods back yet,” I said, my voice a whisper. I both felt and saw Nova tense at my words, but I pressed on. “Your parents, and all the other gods, have taken on the duties of multiple gods to fill in the gaps.” I bit my lip, but made sure I met Nova’s eyes when I tossed out my hypothesis. “Nova, I don’t think she can bring them back. Maybe something is preventing her from doing it, or maybe—” I took a breath. “Maybe she’s not there at all?” He looked scared at my words. Really, really scared. “Are you scared of her?”

“No, not of her,” Nova said, his words leaving him in a rush. He deflated a bit. “I’m scared that you’re right, Aila. What if she isn’t there? What if Obra got to her thousands of years ago, and everyone’s just been pretending that he didn’t this whole time?” 

“Is there a way to go and check?” I asked. He shook his head.

“Very few people have ever been in the space where she resides. Certainly, someone as low on the totem pole as I wouldn’t be allowed in there,” he said. 

“Have you tried?” I asked. He gave me a sad smile.

“I don’t even know where it is,” he admitted. “It’s somewhere else entirely.”

“And where are we?” I asked. I pointed up at the starless, purple sky. “No sun, no moon, no stars. Where are we?”

“Outside the universe,” he said. I blinked, eyes going wide. “Outside of every universe, technically. We can observe from here, but we can’t interact unless we physically go into the universes, and we can only go into our assigned universes. I just happened to be assigned to the one that you come from.”

“Oh,” I said, dumbly. “So, when people in my world pray, is it you they’re praying to?” Something about that sounded extremely blasphemous, but I had to ask. He shook his head.

“Nope, not me. All I can do is observe. Well, all I should be able to do is observe. I broke so many rules going to Meliné when I did, to try to help stop Obra. I’m an idiot,” he admitted. 

“Well,” I said, looking back up at the sky. It may have been cloudless and starless but there was some kind of texture, sort of like glitter without the sparkle, or sand under water. “If you hadn’t gone to Meliné, I wouldn’t be here. And neither would Zanni.” 

As if on cue, an exceptionally loud snore drifted through even the closed stone door behind us. I groaned. Damn, that kid had some lungs.

“You can’t hear him snoring in my room, you know,” Nova said. I looked over at him. “If you’d like, you can sleep in there with me.” I just stared at him, incredulous. He wasn’t asking… no, of course not, there was no way he was. There was no way in any universe that he was actually propositioning me

He seemed to realize just what he’d said and why I was staring, because he… he blushed. Humans blush red, Galvekians with their green skin actually blush a sort of navy blue color, and this handsome purple god blushed a sort of wine red color. 

It was adorable.

“I-I didn’t mean—” he sputtered. “I didn’t mean anything untoward, I swear, I just thought you might appreciate a good night’s rest and I—”

Oh no, he was super adorable when he was blushing and flustered. I could not be having these feelings, this was not happening. 

“I know what you meant,” I managed to interject, stopping his flustered rambling dead in its tracks. “I don’t think you’re a pervert, don’t worry. And I’d love a good night’s sleep, please. Otherwise I might fall asleep tomorrow when we go back to the library.” Oh, fuck, I was going to be alone with this guy for hours, for days even, until we either found something that could help us beat Obra or Obra found a way here and killed us. There really was no hope for me. I could feel myself blushing, too. 

“Well then, shall we?” Nova asked, standing up too quickly. I nodded and started to get up, startled to find a purple hand in my vision. Oh, he was offering to help me up. I gladly took his hand, noting how easily and effortlessly he pulled me to my feet. It was easy to forget, but he was strong, wasn’t he? It was a shame he hid that strength underneath those robes (no, wait bad Aila, bad—)

I was only a little nervous as he led me through the small house, past the snoring Zanni, and into his room. As promised, as soon as his door slid closed the obnoxious snoring sounds completely stopped. It was almost completely quiet. Almost, aside from the faint sounds of the wind in the grass outside, filtering in through the slightly open window. Good. I didn’t think I could sleep in complete silence.

I glanced quickly around the room as Nova stepped past me and made for the bed. It was a surprisingly big bed, especially considering Nova’s smaller stature. Aside from the bed there were shelves with what I assumed to be knick knacks and keepsakes on them scattered throughout the room, a closet, a door that almost certainly led to the bathroom and…not much else. I thought back to my own cabin, probably destroyed by now, and the shelves and countertops crammed full of things, the walls covered in pictures, the joy, the life, the character. I tried not to be sad, both at the state of Nova’s room and at the possibility that my home was gone now. Forever, maybe. I crossed the room too, approaching the opposite side of the bed from where Nova had sat down. I nodded to him.

“Thank you,” I said. He nodded back.

“You’ll need your rest, we’ve got a lot to do tomorrow,” he said. I blinked.

“What, we’re not just spending it at the library again?” I asked. He shook his head.

“No,” he said, cryptically. He climbed under the covers. “I’ll explain at breakfast. Good night, Aila.” 

“Good night,” I echoed. I carefully climbed under the covers, too. The sheets, white, were incredibly soft and cool to the touch. The comforter, white, was perfectly soft and fluffy. The pillows, white, were so comfortable to lay my head on. I was out within seconds.

I woke up, startled, at the realization that I was in bed with someone. It took me a few seconds to get my bearings, remembering where I was and who I was with. Nova had gotten up and was moving around the room, that’s what had woken me up. It was before dawn, of course, but the nights weren’t dark here so I could still see. And I was glad that he hadn’t come over to wake me up just yet because, damn. At some point in the night, Nova had taken off his shirt, and now I was getting an eyeful of a very nice purple chest and back. From the times we had flown to the library I had known he was muscular, but feeling it and seeing it were two different things.

Now, many of my friends, especially among Meliné’s defenders, are muscular men. Many of them like to train without their shirts on. I’ve seen a lot of very nice backs and chests in my life. Nova’s didn’t put theirs to shame, per se, but it was certainly different in a way I was really appreciating. He was still muscular, for certain, but in a more lean way. Oryz, Zanni, Brasca, Pykon: they were all bulky, though Zanni had been more on the lean side as a kid. Nova’s chest was… I abruptly realized that I was staring, openly, and it was a godsdamned miracle that Nova hadn’t noticed yet. I tore my gaze away and sat up.

“Oh, you’re awake. Good morning,” Nova greeted. He scurried over to where he’d abandoned his shirt, quickly slipping it on. I tried not to look disappointed.

“Good morning,” I replied.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked. 

“Very,” I said, honestly. 

“I’m glad. I’m going to go get breakfast ready, and then I’ll tell you what I’ve got planned,” he said. 

“Do you want help?” I asked. He blinked at me.

“Hm?”

“With breakfast, do you want help?” I repeated. 

“Oh, thank you, but no. It’s really just pushing buttons and carrying food around, honestly,” he said. Ah, was that the secret to his cooking? He wasn’t really cooking, just pushing buttons? Technology. Pah.

“Well, if you need help carrying breakfast, Zanni and I can help,” I said. I stood, stretching until my back cracked itself back into place. I headed for the door, bracing myself for the wall of noise that was surely on the other side, and… yep. The chainsaw snores continued.

“I’m tired of books, so today we’re going to do some training of our own, and work on improving that healing spell of yours,” is what Nova had said over breakfast. And so it was that I found myself standing beside Zanni out on the lawn, doing some familiar, nostalgic warm-up exercises. As soon as Nova had confirmed that there would be warm-ups and sparring and other exercise I, too, had ripped the sleeves right off of the robe I was wearing. “I’ll sew them back on,” I’d said in response to Nova’s look of genuine horror. Zanni had just laughed his ass off.

Now here we were, Nova, Zanni and I, lined up and facing Master Shan who looked grave as ever. He hadn’t been surprised in the slightest to find two new pupils for him to train this morning. I got the sense, especially after watching the two gods engage in a quick sparring match, that this was not even remotely the first time they had trained together. Master Shan was probably the person that had trained Nova in the first place.

It wasn’t long before I was staring up at the impassive, huge form of Master Shan myself. To my surprise he invited me to spar and, even though he thoroughly kicked my ass, he still helped me to my feet and gave me a pat on the shoulder after said ass-kicking.

“Not bad,” he said. “You are stronger than you look.” I took it as a compliment. 

Master Shan and Zanni went off to continue their usual training, leaving Nova and myself behind. 

“Alright, let’s work on that healing technique,” Nova said. I nodded, facing him. “You are already quite skilled with it, but it could use quite a bit of refinement. I’m sure you noticed how much more effective my healing technique was on Zanni?”

“That’s because you’ve got way, way more anim than me,” I pointed out. “And you’re a god.” 

“Well, yes on both counts,” Nova agreed. “But my technique is also much more refined than yours. More honed. Let’s work on that.” 

“You’ve also had hundreds of years more than me to practice,” I added. He sighed and gave me an exasperated look. I returned it with a cheeky grin. “But, okay, yes, let’s refine my technique. Please teach me,” I said. I didn’t ask how this, exactly, was going to help against Obra. I had a feeling this was meant to be a distraction for both of us. 

What it really came down to, he explained, were two things: focus, and the flow of anim. I could increase the healing output by pouring in more of my anim, but I would exhaust myself in the process. That was simply because I wasn’t focused enough, wasn’t using the flow of my own body’s anim properly. 

This, for some reason, resulted in me sitting on the ground and Nova kneeling behind me, so close that his chest was just barely not touching my back, while he leaned over my shoulder and murmured things into my ear. It was…impossible to concentrate. Especially once the gentle, cautious, featherlight touches began. Anim, he explained, moved throughout all bodies in the same way, more or less. A gentle touch on my bare shoulder, dragged down my bare arm, down to the top of my hand (why did I rip off those sleeves, why did I rip off those sleeves, why did I rip off those sleeves) as he explained that anim generally flows out from the torso to the fingers if it is being used for a spell or an attack, but otherwise it flows in the opposite direction. I nodded, not trusting my voice. It was so hard to listen to what he was saying, focus on his words, because that touch was…if I didn’t know any better, I’d have said it was sensual. He dragged that featherlight touch back up my arm to my shoulder and I shuddered.

“Oh, are you cold?” he asked. I could only give a meek nod. “Well, you shouldn’t have ripped the sleeves off of my robe then, huh?” he asked. Teasing. He was teasing me. Was he flirting with me? No, no way, that was wishful thinking. 

“I get it, this is revenge for the sleeves,” I said.

“Revenge? Hm?” he asked. The teasing lilt was gone from his voice. He shuffled around behind me, leaning around me to look me in the face, concerned. He was close. His face was so close. If I wanted to I could lean forward and kiss him, and— “Was I doing something unpleasant? Am I making you uncomfortable?” he asked. I sure was stuck in a quandary. If I said yes, that would have been a lie. If I said no that was also a lie, though…

“Why don’t you demonstrate the anim flow with your body and not mine?” I requested. Did he look disappointed? Or was that just more wishful thinking? In any case, he quickly apologized and stood up, moving until he was facing me. He demonstrated the anim flow in his own body, and I thought I could start to feel it in my own body, too, now that I could feel anything other than the ghost of that touch on my arm or the blood pounding in my body as my heart raced. Nova was gonna kill me before Obra ever got the chance, at this rate.

After that, Nova had me try out healing spells, reminding me to let the anim flow instead of forcing it, and I could feel the spell working better to my own surprise. After a quick break for lunch, we decided to try sparring. “Sparring improves your body, which improves your capacity for anim,” Pykon had always said. I passed that wisdom on to Nova, who nervously agreed. I soon found out why he was nervous. In terms of anim he had me outclassed by leagues. But in hand-to-hand combat? He wasn’t bad or anything, but he was clearly not a front-row fighter. We were just about evenly matched, in this category at least. It was refreshing. I didn’t like sparring with Pykon or Zanni because of how much stronger they were than me, not to mention taller, but Nova… Nova was… perfect. 

I soon found myself getting flipped onto my back. A triumphant Nova loomed over me, holding down a hand for me to take to get back up. 

“Yes! Got you that time!” he cheered. I didn’t have the heart to tell him it was because I was distracted. 

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